ficlet; 331 words.
|The hardest decision Jonghyun’s ever had to make is to let Jinki go. It happens on a day he never quite saw coming, when he realized that the way he felt for Jinki was stronger than he originally thought.|
“Are you okay?” Jinki says. He’s standing in the doorway between the dimly illuminated hallway and the complete darkness of the room, where Jonghyun has closed himself in for the last hour.
Jonghyun doesn’t look up, but he hears Jinki come closer and so he inches away. He does the opposite of everything he’s ever wanted to, retracting from Jinki’s touch instead of leaning in, letting out a choked sob instead of greeting Jinki with a smile.
“Hey,” Jinki says, soft now, against his skin. “What happened?”
Jonghyun shakes his head and doesn’t answer. Trying to compose himself enough to speak, he lets out a shaky breath when he opens his mouth again. Jinki is still there, still looking at him and not moving, but all Jonghyun wants to do is make him go.
“Alone,” is the only word he’s able to get out, and even then it still comes out broken. Jinki’s an idiot and doesn’t really understand yet, but the last thing Jonghyun will do is look him in the eyes and say it again because he doesn’t mean it. He doesn’t really mean it. “Go,” he says.
“I—” Jinki stutters. “Jonghyun?”
“I can’t do this anymore,” and Jonghyun’s voice cracks on the last syllable. Jinki doesn’t understand, doesn’t get it, and maybe Jonghyun is starting to fool himself into believing he really does want to stay in solitude.
“Do what?” Jinki says, confused. “If I can do anything to help—”
“You can leave,” Jonghyun says. “Now.”
Jonghyun doesn’t think he’s ever heard Jinki stumble out of a room faster, confused, and if Jonghyun allows himself to hope, just a little bit heartbroken.
THIS IS FOR jonghyun BUT NOT HER BIRTHDAY PRESENT, JUST SOMETHING I'M POSTING SO SHE WON'T HATE ME WHILE HAVING TO WAIT SOME MORE. ilu bijae i promise your bday fic will be happy and idk why it's taking so long?? I HAVEN'T FORGOTTEN, I PROMISE.